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Archive for the tag “Trusting God”

18 Sep 2013
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Wavering

Doubt. Belief. Confidence. Fear. Trust. Unbelief. Have you ever had all those feelings wrestling in your spirit? I had them all in mere moments of one another just the other day. My spirit had been convicted of my lack of faith. Got up from my quiet time, confident my heart was set right before Jesus. But in just moments as I was taking my daily walk, the wrestling began. I am in a spiritual battle concerning my trust in God. Trust in what He has promised through His word. Trust that He is who He says He is. Trust that all things are possible even when it looks impossible. I am stuck with Egypt behind me and the Red Sea before me. Is there a way that I just can’t see right now? Faith says to be sure of the things I am hoping for and to be certain in the things that are not seen (Hebrews 11:1). As I was concluding my walk, the word that was given in my spirit was the word to Gideon from the angel of the Lord: “go in the strength you have” (Judges 6:14).

I am wrestling also about what I am supposed to do, and what God is supposed to do. What are my responsibilities? I read the passage about Peter collecting the tax money from a fish. The money was found after Peter went to fish. Jesus told Peter go do what he was trained to do – go fish – and the provisional tax money would be provided in an improbable place – in the fish’s mouth (Matthew 17:24-27). Jesus asked Peter to go back to what he knew for just a short time until the tax money was found. Is this something Jesus is asking me to do? The strength that I have had in my past was financial work. If I go back, is it like I am giving up on what the Lord has called me to do? Or is this just for a short time until the provision is met? Or maybe it’s to get back on track with writing my story. One of the questions circling in my mind: if I knew I could not fail, what would I do?

Lots of questions with very few answers, right now. As I discern the real meaning behind the word given, I have to believe without seeing. I have to trust God and His Word. I should have the confidence in my heart that He’s enough for me even when I see the Red Sea before me. He has a way out that I am not seeing right now. And if I need to fish for a little while, then I have to trust God to move me into the right position for the right time for what I am called to do. I have to quit looking at the waves and just fix my eyes upon Jesus. I have His peace filling every pore of my being. He is the only one who has all the answers! Thank you Jesus!

When the angel of the Lord appeared to Gideon, he said, “The Lord is with you, mighty warrior.” The Lord turned to him and said, “Go in the strength you have and save Israel out of Midian’s hand. Am I not sending you?” So Gideon built an altar to the Lord there and called it The Lord is Peace. Judges 6:12,14,24

Posted in Faith and tagged , , , , ,
12 Jun 2013

Defining Moment

We all have defining moments in our lives when we have to give in to the fear or trust God in faith. I had one of those defining moments recently. For several days I wrestled with fear. I have been on the road to a healthy lifestyle for the last seven years. With God’s provision, I have recovered my health so that I am more fit and healthy today. I am able to go and do as never before. Even so much so, I have taken on the challenge of going on the mission field for a week in Honduras. It’s only through the grace and mercy of God that I am able to do these things.

But it comes with a challenge to my health issues. I surrendered to the fact I needed shots to do this mission trip. As I was in the nurse’s office listening to all the dos and don’ts, I had a bit of anxiety come over me. It has only grown in my mind since. I have been wrestling with the fear of losing my health once again. With God’s help, I have changed many things to bring about my health. It’s been a long seven years of change. But I feel so good right now that the thought of suffering again brings about the fear. I realize this is spiritual warfare going on. This fear only comes from Satan. God doesn’t give us a spirit of fear but power, love and discipline (2 Timothy 1:7).

In my quiet time, two things were put before me. The first was from Philippians 2:12b-13: “continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose.” Through this passage, I found I need to trust God completely. I need to trust that He will work all things for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose (Romans 8:28). If God allows something to happen to my health, then He will work it out for His glory. Charles Stanley commented on this passage in his devotional “we must realize whatever we experience is under the authority of a kind, loving Father. God never allows anything to touch us that He will not turn to our benefit and the good of His kingdom.” Satan is only allowed so much leeway. Satan has no authority but only that which God has granted him for a time.

The second thing that came into my focus was from Matthew 5:13-16. We are to be the salt and light for the glory of God. I can do nothing without Him. If He chooses for me to suffer a little while, then I need to be ready to suffer for His name with no complaints. Jesus suffered far more than I will ever have to endure. This is my defining moment to trust God completely in all things. I surrender Lord! I am your servant – let it be as you say. Amen.

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?”And I said, “Here am I. Send me!” Isaiah 6:8

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