buildingbodies4christ

building on the foundation of Jesus Christ

27 Feb 2013

Small Talk

It was interesting to find myself in two different study groups on this particular week, each participant sharing their testimony. What should have been a brief word of their testimony became a long version of their life history. I was a bit frustrated for some reason. I guess one reason was because we were not going to be able to get into the word because the time was running short. I had to sit back and consider other reasons for my frustrations. I think I was seeing reality more clearly. Women like to talk. Now, I know I am a woman, but I have had a quiet nature for the most part. I don’t really talk endlessly and I see no point in it. My testimony was pretty brief – I hit the highlights. The more others were talking, I thought, I want a do-over. But I realized that was my own desire to be heard coming from an insecure place.

How should a testimony be given? What are the specifics that are really important to share? What needs to be shared at a different time? I have never thought about this before until this moment. I gave the basics of my story. I realized others stories are just as important as what I had to say. God is at work in everyone’s life. In another group, one lady shared how God was working in her life. I realized I had asked God on this particular week to help me learn my place of importance. My pride gets the best of me sometimes. I heard someone say pride is what kicked Satan out of heaven. Ouch. I don’t want to think too highly of myself, but I know I do sometimes.

God is introducing me to a new perspective. I need to pay attention to these instances when circumstances repeat themselves. A friend was talking about seeing her car all around town recently. Before the last few weeks, she never saw it. But now everywhere she goes she sees herself. What’s the significance in that? I don’t know, but she’s been made aware of a pattern that she had never noticed before. When we are made aware of a pattern, we will recognize it when we see it. God is showing me a pattern that I can easily fall into unless I am aware of it. My pride will go before a fall. I need to recognize the pattern that so easily entangles me and causes me to fall. Falling is the pits!

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Philippians 2:3-4

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20 Feb 2013

Love Language

Last week, I wrote about love. This seems to be a theme for me right now. Back before the holidays, I was searching for my “love language.” How do I experience love? I was struggling with my Mom not being with me anymore. She showed her love by giving gifts. But I found my language was about quality time. When I was processing all this information, I had an epiphany. Jesus’ love language is about “acts of service.” We show love to Him by serving others. I know; I should have known this all along. But it finally registered with me. I wrote about this also in my first blog in 2013. (I know, I’m repeating myself again.)

I am currently in the Beth Moore Bible study called “James Mercy Triumphs.” There was one point she made on this particular day – “Live It.” We are to live out our faith. Faith without works is a dead faith. I’ve heard this time and time again. I get it. I go home from the study group and listen to a sermon while I eat lunch. It was awesome! But the main take away was this: we are to serve others if we are to be successful in this life (success in God’s viewpoint not the worlds). It’s not about me. The preacher issued the challenge to make God first priority, others second and ourselves third. If we do it in that order, we would change our world, and we would change the world.

God had already spoken to me about this before the holidays. Did I ignore the “suggestion” about serving others or did it slip my mind? It doesn’t really matter at this point. I need to find a place to serve in the community. I need to be out in the world serving others. I need to be the hands and feet of Jesus. I need to show that I really do love Jesus. It’s good to have this revelation, but I need to put things into action. There is too much to do for the sake of the kingdom and time is growing short. It’s time to change the world!

I am changing my mindset – “It’s not about me.” my new theme. I love Jesus! It’s time to show it.

What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them? Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead. James 2:14-17

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13 Feb 2013
1 Comment

Love, Love, Love

This is the word that has been coming up over and over for a few weeks now. What’s love got to do with anything? It is the only word that matters – apparently. God loves us so much He sent His son for us (John 3:16). Jesus states the greatest commandment is to love God with all our hearts, our souls and our minds (Matthew 22:37). The second most important commandment is to love others as we love ourselves (Matthew 22:39). Yeah, love is important. But what is on my mind today as I am writing this, how do I show love to God and to others? Is it going the extra mile? Is it to help others who cannot help themselves? Is it to feed His sheep? Is it worshiping Him through serving others? Yes, to all the above and more.

I am contemplating going on my first mission trip. I have had opportunities to go in the past, but there have always been obstacles to going. One time I had the opportunity through my church, but I didn’t have the vacation time and money was also an issue. Another was the place of service – I just didn’t want to go there (yeah, I know, wrong attitude). I am now in a new church environment where they are all focused on serving others. I am in the right place at the right time in my life. I recognize the need to go and serve even when it’s uncomfortable. I have the opportunity to go this year. Yes, there are obstacles to going – money still being a part of it. Will I push through and take the step of faith? Is this the right time?

The answer will determine how much I believe that love and service go hand in hand. In John 13 we find the story of Jesus bending down to wash his disciples’ feet. Someone else should have done it when they entered the room, but no one did. He even washed the disciple’s feet who would betray him. He stooped down in front of Judas. Did Jesus look into Judas’ eyes as he lowered Judas’ feet into the water? I imagine Jesus’ love was etched into every action on that day; His last day before His crucifixion. Jesus tells us that we would be blessed if we do the same for others. It must have been important enough that He took the time on that crucial last day to show the example of service.

Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet. I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. Very truly I tell you, no servant is greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them. John 13:14-17

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06 Feb 2013

Stirring It Up

I heard a sermon from TD Jakes in November that has stuck with me. In it he gave an illustration of an eagle building a nest for the eaglets to be born. The nest is nicely placed high with little room for error. The nest is made with all the sticks pointing outward. It is made for comfort for the young eaglet. The eagle readies the nest just in time for the arrival of the eaglets. The nest is the comfortable place as long as the eaglet is small. The eagle will begin to stir up the nest so that the sticks are now pointing inward as the eaglet becomes too large for the nest. This creates an environment that is less than suitable for comfort and more likely to cause the eaglet to hop out of the nest. However, once out of the nest, the eaglet is forced to live on the very edge of the cliff or fly.

I was interested in this topic as I began to notice how my life has been much like that of the eaglet. I had been living in my comfortable nest for too many years. Slowly, as I began to grow in my spiritual life, God began to stir up my nest. The first sign of growth was moving to a new city with a message on my heart – God had a plan for me in my new city. I moved to a new place and settled down again. I had another growth spurt, and the nest was stirred even more. Each time, the place of comfort became a place of discontent. The comfortable place was becoming too small for me as I was growing up. Eventually, I was hanging on to the ledge. It was either stay on the edge and eventually die; or take a step of faith and fly.

I chose to fly. One of the great things about eagle’s wings is this: they can travel great distances with little energy being expended. They are carried on the air current. They travel as far as a hummingbird. The hummingbird lives only about 18 months whereas the eagle lives for years. Sometimes I feel like the hummingbird flying with all my strength. I need to remember I have eagle’s wings. The Holy Spirit has provided the current; I am just along for the ride. I can be carried great distances, if I will allow the Holy Spirit to move me. God has stirred up my nest both physically and spiritually. I am no longer content to being as I was. I want more. I want greater distances. I want higher perspectives. I want His vision for my life. I want His wind beneath my wings. I want to soar to greater heights for His glory!

But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:31 (ESV)

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30 Jan 2013

Gratitude

For a few weeks, I have been asking God what is hindering my relationship with Him. First, I received a call to be re-baptized. I believe God wanted me to give a public testimony of the heart change that has happened in me over the last few years. I was obedient to Him. Then I believed God was telling me I had a stronghold on my finances. I was trusting in the security of the money in the bank and not on Him alone. I followed through on something God had placed on my heart. I am sure I will still have to deal with this stronghold in the future, but for now I can move on. The next thing I heard was my heart was not turned to gratitude. After the Thanksgiving holiday, I hadn’t really considered gratitude to be an issue for me. But the more I think about it, the more certain I am this is a big hindrance in my relationship with Jesus as well as with others.

I was considering Christmas. I was thinking of presents – not in giving but getting. I like certain things from certain places. I would always supply a list for the benefit of getting the things I like. This has been the normal mode of operation during my Mom’s gift giving opportunities. This past year I was faced with the possibilities of getting things that are not on the “approved” list. I was complaining about that fact. When I heard the sermon about gratitude, I immediately thought of my conversation or complaining session. I was not thinking about receiving a gift from someone’s heart, I was thinking about getting something I might not like. I thought of others who get nothing for Christmas, and I felt very ashamed of my attitude. I also thought of the many times I received a gift but thought nothing of it. Looking back, I think I was more entitled to the gift instead of receiving it with gratitude.

I remember my Mom watching me and my sisters open our presents. She was anticipating our reactions. My reactions were less than what they should have been. I wonder how many times I have had the same attitude with God. Probably more times than not.  I can imagine Him sitting on His throne watching us as we “unwrap” His blessings. He is sitting there waiting on our reactions, anticipating our thrill of receiving such a great blessing. Then nothing. I am ashamed to admit my ingratitude to the many blessings God has given me. Oh, I might have offered a “thanks” to God, but I most likely didn’t really have the right heart attitude when I said it. I know God wants to give us good gifts. If the reaction is indifference or less than total gratitude, why would He continue to give us good things?

Yes, God has done a work in me, but there is so much more to do. My heart has been replaced, but I still need some heart surgery to fix the areas that are not beating in accordance with God’s heart.

Let them praise the Lord for his great love and for the wonderful things he has done for them. Psalm 107:8 (NLT) Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me. Psalm 51:10 (ESV)

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23 Jan 2013

Hindrance #1

As my usual practice, I sat down to a nice lunch and my internet tuned to one of my favorite pastors. What I thought was going to be a new word about Esther was really an old word on pride. I have been asking God during my devotional time to reveal to me where my heart is deceiving me. It was to my surprise that pride is such an issue currently in my life. I guess the surprise was the surprise. I knew I had many times in the past dealt with pride, but I thought it was in the past. That should have been my first clue. My heart was truly deceiving me. I recognize pride in others – it’s all around me. I see it in the way others boast about their accomplishments. I even have laughed about the fact when it is confronted in others. But really, do I still have issues with it? Oh yeah. One thing the pastor (Mark Driscoll) spoke about was that pride is masked in fear of failure. We lack the effort to try because of our pride issues and not wanting to look bad when we fail. Oh yeah, that’s me.

In the Word, God speaks about how He hates pride. Pride gives glory to me and not to God – hmmm, sounds a lot like idolatry. God says pride is an abomination to Him (Proverbs 16:5 ESV). He also states pride will go before a fall (Proverbs 16:18 ESV). God states that we should be clothed in humility. Humility means we know our place in this world. I am so much more aware of my status in this world after completing my latest book based on my life story. I am nothing without God. I am so blessed to have been taken out of my pit and set upon the Rock of Salvation. God could have left me in that pit of despair. But He didn’t. God looks at my heart and sees the darkness. But God being full of grace and mercy didn’t leave me in my darkness. He brought me out. He bandaged my wounds; healed my heart. He led me away from destruction into His light for His glory, not mine. He is the reason I should have no pride in my heart. I should be clothed in humility.

God is in the process of pruning and purifying me. There’s still so much more work to be done. But I submit to His shears. He has the best in mind for me. God wants us to be submitted to Him, but I have to intentional in my submitting. This isn’t a half-hearted attempt. I’m either all in or all out. It’s up to me to draw near. Here I am Lord!

Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Be wretched and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you. James 4:7-10 (ESV)

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16 Jan 2013
4 Comments

Pennies from Heaven

I was having a bad day. I had been writing all morning. I was struggling to get through writing about the worst days of my life. I was having fits of crying from emotionally draining memories. I listened to a sermon while I ate lunch. It was about worrying. I’m really not much on worrying. Sure I have concerns, but I can’t call them worries, can I? I listened to the sermon and the last point the preacher made was about uncertainties of the future – hmmm… maybe I do have a “worry” after all. He said to bring the whole truth to God, and He would give me peace which transcends all understanding. It really wasn’t about the uncertainty, but about the “fear of the unknown.”

The section of my life I was writing about was the death of my Mom. It was the hardest thing I have lived through in my “relatively” short life. I had to sit down after that sermon and discern what my real concern is about the uncertainty of my future. I am single. My whole life, my parents were my family. Yes, I have sisters but they have their own lives and families. Oh, I know I am a part of their families, but it’s not the same. When push comes to shove as the saying goes, they think of their families before they do me – as it should be. If I was married and had kids, I would be doing the same thing, but I don’t.

A year after my Mom died, my Dad got married again. Praise God, he found someone to live out the remaining years of his life. Once again, I am left in a bit of a predicament. God has shown me my real fear. I am afraid of being alone. I know I have family and friends, but I really am totally alone. This was my deepest, truest revelation I have had in quite some time. As I was in the midst of this struggle on this day, I decided to go for an afternoon walk. I was tired of thinking about these deep issues.

Once again, God opened up my heart to look down. I saw two pennies lying on the street as I walked along. If you remember from a post several months ago, God places pennies in my path to remind me “in God we trust.” I have only one who really is my source of strength and who I can rely upon. The future is uncertain and no one is guaranteed a long life. I could be alone whether I was married or single. I acknowledged God’s providence and continued on. My fear of the financial future came up as well. I don’t have money coming in, and I don’t have any prospects of the future. Again, a penny was placed before me. God will work it out. I have to trust Him with everything! Yes, I have anxious times ahead, but God is faithful in everything. He is in control!

Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:4-7

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09 Jan 2013

Endurance

Last week, I listened to the Passion Conference on LiveStream. There were some awesome speakers who brought a fresh word to me. The conference is led by Louie Giglio (Passion City Church) from Atlanta. The teachers brought some powerful words to my ears. I listened with anticipation of what God was going to say to me. This was the first time I had listened in to this conference. I don’t know what previous conferences were all about, but this one was bringing awareness to the plight of 27 million who are held in slavery. The conference is kicking off an “End It” movement (check out the website www.enditmovement.com). Francis Chan spoke about being a part of the battle. Beth Moore spoke on Jesus’ last Passover meal. John Piper spoke on embracing the suffering. And then the conference was wrapped up with Pastor Louie.

Pastor Louie spoke about the dry bones passage found in Ezekiel 37. I love this particular passage. He brought home the fact we are to be anointed with the Holy Spirit in order to work in the power of the Holy Spirit. The night before, John Piper spoke about embracing suffering just as all who are called to the cause of liberation have to endure. There is a prize for those who endure the suffering. The prize is found on the other side of heaven and it is worth it all. In the passage, God had to put the breath (the Holy Spirit) in the slain in order for them to live. Once the breath of God entered the bodies, they stood up and were a vast army.

God is calling us to stand up. There are many who need for us to take up their cause – to fight when they can’t do so. We need the power of the Holy Spirit to fill us, in order to fight the fight. We need to embrace the suffering that will surely come when we take up the cause of liberation. Jesus came for our liberation. He embraced the suffering he knew that was coming on that Passover night. He fulfilled the Scriptures in every sense of the Word. The Passover Lamb was slain, the bread was broken, and the cup (of wine) was poured out for each of us. And once it was finished, He sat down at the right hand of God. The race is before us. The course is set. Will we finish the race or give up because it costs us too much?

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:1-2

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02 Jan 2013

New Year, New Thing

I love new things. I buy new cars and drive them for many years. I love the new car smell (even though I know it’s toxic). I love new houses. I love to watch them start from nothing to become the blueprint in 3D. I love new clothes and how they make me feel. I love to see new ideas come to life. I love new seasons of the year – especially spring and fall. I love to plant things and watch them grow. I love a clean slate when there are no expectations – open mind; ready for anything that comes my way.

2013 is a clean slate. I have no expectations for this year. Oh, I have a few things I want to accomplish. I set some spiritual goals. There are a few things I am praying to happen. But I don’t know God’s direction for me yet. I have been reading several books lately about “purpose.” I got a couple more as gifts for Christmas. I read about the five love languages, and it dawned on me that Jesus has a love language too. He knows our love for him when we are doing “acts of service.” One of the things I will be working on this year is how I will show more love to Jesus. Jesus ask Peter (found in John 21:15-19) if he loved Him. Peter replied “yes, Lord, you know I love you.” Jesus told Peter to “feed His sheep.” What does “feeding sheep” look like in my current city? What is my purpose in this place? What need am I called to fill?

These are the questions that need to be answered this year. I didn’t do such a great job last year. I have been in this city, in this neighborhood for thirteen years. Have I made a difference? God called me to my city for a “job” and I have been wandering in the wilderness wondering where this job is. I was in a new place, found a new church and new friends. I was excited about all the newness. But then the newness wore off, and I’m still here looking for the reason for this particular city at this particular time.

As I sit on the cusp of a new year, I am anxiously waiting to see where the sheep need to be tended. I don’t want to have another year down with little difference being made. It’s time to be busy loving Jesus as He wants to be loved. It’s time for all things to be made new – even my mindset – ready to serve in the name of Jesus. Hold me to it!

Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert. Isaiah 43:19 (ESV)

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31 Dec 2012
2 Comments

Forgiveness

With today being the last day of the year, I thought it would be appropriate to end it with a post. I started this year with the theme of victory. I think victory comes through forgiveness. God has done a major work in my heart this year. He took a broken place – one that I didn’t even know I had – and brought about healing, restoration, and forgiveness. I was hurt. I was angry, but it was a passive aggressive type. I didn’t know how angry I really was until God opened my eyes. I was ready to be healed. I asked God to show me the places in my heart that were hindering my walk with Him. There were some obvious places like my Mom’s death, my Dad’s quick marriage, but there was a place buried so deep that I didn’t recognize it. God knew it was there though. And He proceeded to show me inch by inch where I was hindered. I’m sure I am not done with forgiving. I’m sure there are still places that need to be healed. Inch by inch, He is faithful to reveal if I am willing to be open to it.

Now, what do I do with this information? How do I use it for His glory? God has placed in me a need to tell. I first went to the ones I could go to and ask for forgiveness. I went to God and asked His forgiveness. But the ones that hurt me so deeply, they are the ones that I have to forgive. They probably don’t even know how deep I was hurt. They are probably not even aware I have been carrying this around with me for so long. It was hurting me not them. It was hurting my relationship with God, with Jesus and with the Holy Spirit who lives in me. I may not actually talk to them about it. But I offer my forgiveness now. I have laid down my heart: my hurt, my anger, my bitterness, my resentment and have taken up forgiveness because God first forgave me.

It’s time to heal and move on. Jesus forgave those who put Him on the cross – the ones that nailed him, tortured him, spat upon him, and he did it from the cross. His love endures forever no matter what. It’s because of Him and his love that I can go forward with forgiveness. What will God do in 2013? He’s still working on my heart, but it will be for His glory no matter what! Happy New Year!

For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. Matthew 6:14-15

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